GBH Revisited

As my commited readers (Hi Mum!) will know, way back when, I mentioned that I was involved in a dispute against a bouncer. What I mean is that he kicked me in the face and knocked out two of my teeth, but let's not get pedantic. Obviously the police got involved, and started a case of GBH against said bouncer.

However, despite the fact that this happened within three feet of the club I was being 'escorted' out of, and there was a hefty queue still wanting to go in, who clearly saw it happen, there was no CCTV evidence of it happening (the CID guy in charge of the case called it a 'blip') and only about two people came forward as witnesses, aside from those I approached directly.

The case trudged on without gaining much traction, the bouncers all denied it, saying I was headbutted by someone in the queue (I was wondering where my teeth ended up, they must have been lodged in this fictional forehead). About a month or two ago, CID man called me sheepishly to say that the case was being dropped because there wasn't enough  decent evidence to bother going to court with. He hastened tp explain about evidence needing to be 'beyond reasonable doubt', which I found somewhat ironic seeing as that's one of the things I've been learning about in Media Law. I did get the impression that he was used to people shouting at him at that point as they don't understand what that means. Basically the only real evidence I had in my favour were the witnesses, and let's face it, it was past midnight, outside a club. They were drunk, and therefore, testimony could not be trusted.

But I'm not bitter. Don't get me wrong, I'll never trust a fat, skinhead, police academy dropout to look after my safety again, and I wouldn't be averse to hear that the club in question burnt down and was replaced with a Starbucks. But I'm not bitter...

Anyway, the main reason I'm writing this is that I think it's a good exercise of catharsis, and I just wanted to thank everyone who helped me out that night, and throughout the investigation, you all know who you are.

Cheers.

P.S. Sorry if this made any of you awkward, but it's finished now. I promise I'll get right back to reporting the inane stories that so appeal to my core demographic (Hi Mum!).

Yet Another New Aide to Mr Cameron

Fresh news from the politics section of the BBC's website that seems to have caused no little controversy in Westminster. Following last month's reports of Number 10's rat problem, the right honourable household has adopted Larry the cat, a former stray, who has experience in ratting from his time on the streets. The tom is a tabby moggy, who is apparently family friendly, and if my personal experience of stray toms is anything to go by, he'll be (as my dad says) built like a brick shithouse, and will no doubt be leaving many a gall bladder in our PM's slippers.

Larry was chosen by the pro-cat faction of Downing Street, despite calls from MPs that dogs make better hunters, one saying that "a good Jack Russel would come and sort out the problem pretty damn quick." He will join the ranks of former chief mousers such as Rufus of England, the Munich Mouser, and Humphrey, of the Thatcherite era.

As a cat-lover I'm very happy to hear that Battersea Cats and Dogs' home has lost a resident. Though I can't help but think that many Country-Tories will be outraged at the hypocrisy. If they can't hunt, why can he? It's also worth wondering whether we'll be seeing a new name on the sheets of the expenses scandal, having spent £5000 on Sheba and a luxuriously plumed scratching post.

So tell me, avid readers, which are you? Cat, or Dog?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-12288771
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-12460596

No Space Babies!!

Sad news today, as scientists confirmed everyone's biggest worry about space travel. That's right, according to priority one research from NASA, it will be damn near impossible to conceive in space. No doubt there will be rigorous testing, just to be certain mind, but it does seem that all those sci-fi fantasies of space colonies living on for generation after generation were all so much wasted imagination. I can only think that our only option is either getting on with inventing warp speed. Or finally sorting out cryogenic freezing in an Alien-esque form of sleeping off a mere 50 or so years.

This devastating news, comes in the wake of the Mars 500 experiment to see how humans would cope with being isolated in a spaceship for the 8 months or so it would take to reach Mars. The volunteers for the research were shut up in mock spaceships last June, and limited to voice contact only. They are due to be let out this Saturday, wearing real spacesuits, to have a jaunt around in the desert, pretending they are on Mars. Sounds a bit like my childhood. Except for the part about being shut away in steel tubes for months at a time. Mine were perspex.

It does make me very happy that all this important research is going on. I mean, what else do scientists have to do with their time?

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/why-infertility-will-stop-humans-colonising-space-2213861.html
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/mock-mars-mission-simulates-landing-on-red-planet-2214628.html

Sunday News

It's a Sunday and it's pouring with rain, and yet I still trudge into town to buy the paper, this course is clearly starting to affect me. I thought I'd try something a little different and do a little of the news in brief. Unfortunately I'm not topless and there's no picture anyway so you'd just have to use your imagination. To be honest, if you want to see some boobs that badly then what are you doing reading this blog? You must be on the Internet if you're reading this. Either that or you've nicked my iPad. One way or the other, go have fun.

Ok, for the few of you left who either didn't fancy it, or weren't horribly offended, congratulations! You've passed the first test.

Back on track then. The first story that caught my eye was in the New York Times. They were discussing the implications of an estimate from the UN that, by 2050, there will be about 1.5 billion people aged 65 and over. My first thought to this was that the whole world is going to start looking like Devon. My second thought was, what on earth is the girl in that picture wearing? It looks like a cross between a builder's overalls and hardhat, and bungee jumping gear. It is called Age Gain Now Empathy System. Or more simply, Agnes. It is designed to simulate old age, to help teach young(er) people the difficulties that face the old. Now, I have a problem with this. Before you all start writing angry comments (here's hoping). I don't mean I have a problem with people empathising with the elderly. But why do I never read about a suit that simulates flying, or playing a video game. Better yet, people making suits that do fly, or turn invisible, or do your homework for you. I'm just saying. That'd be cool too.

I also want to give a shout-out to the Americans, who seem to be becoming more and more tolerant by the day. Not only do they have black president, and a female presidential candidate. Fred Karger is now America's first openly gay candidate for the White House. It's still early days yet, and he is virtually unknown, even to Americans, yet he seems to accepts this quite happily. At this point, most people are asking the same question as that emblazoned on much of his campaign gear: "Fred who?"

The New York Times also had a fantastic story about the oldest of Australia's 'micronations'. The Principality of Hutt River. Formed by Leonard Casey, also known as His Majesty Prince Leonard I of Hutt, after a wheat quota dispute with the government 40 years ago, it has apparently become a tourist attraction for many backpackers, and the like. also giving citizenship to about 13,000 people, not to mention bestowing knighthoods on their loyal subjects. I think this story is brilliant for so many reasons, but mostly I just admire the man for doing it in the first place. Not to mention when he declared war...

Ok then one more and I'll let you go off and do something you enjoy. The rise in student tuition fees is still being reported on. While many older readers may think of us students as a load of sponging, work-shy, layabouts, not to mention a load of hoodlums since the demonstrations. There are a few of us that do want to leave uni with something more worthwhile than a hangover. However, the budget cuts that are forcing many universities to increase their fees, may also be having an effect on teaching levels. Research done in the Russell Group of unis has found that the average amount of hours a week that a student spends with a lecturer has gone down from 15.6 to 14.7. Admittedly, not a great deal of change, but that is only between 2009 and 2010. What could it end up being by the time the increase in fees occurs, and the full effect of the budget cuts become apparent? Among this is also a survey that has found that students rating their experience of university as excellent has dropped by half. Once more, you have to wonder where it's going to end.

In a related note, there is news that may well anger the middle class among you, those students whose parents earn less than £28,000 a year will receive help from the government, and the uni, to the tune of £6000. Leaving the student to pay the remaining £3000. That is actually an improvement to what is being payed by the majority of students at the moment (£3,290). Including me. Damn, younger poor people. They have all the luck.


http://www.nytimes.com/2011/02/06/business/06aging.html?scp=1&sq=Age%20Gain%20Now%20Empathy%20System&st=cse
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/feb/13/republicans-gay-rights-presidential-race
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/02/02/world/asia/02australia.html?pagewanted=1
http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2011/feb/13/university-students-teaching-hours-tuition-fees?INTCMP=SRCH

Matters of Murdoch

The phone hacking scandal, brewing since 2006, after Clive Goodman and his asscoiates were charged with hacking the phones of the royal household has taken, even more of a downturn. Lately, the number of high profile victims is on the increase. Sarah Ferguson and John Prescott have both been informed that there is evidence that they have been targeted by phone hackers working with Rupert Murdoch's paper the News of the World.

Prescott said (no doubt as eloquently as possible) that the new Assistant Deputy Commissioner of the Met, Sue Akers, had expressed her dissatisfaction with the initial investigation. Unsurprising, since, as this debacle has progressed, one story after another has unravelled like a roll of toilet paper being chewed on by Labrador puppy.

I do take issue with Murdoch over this business. I don't particularly want to move into a profession which has gained a dodgy, untrustworthy reputation. I'm fully aware that this is by no means the first time journalists have earned us all a bad repute, and it certainly won't be the last. But, as my teachers used to tell me: "You're not just letting yourself down..."

Though it seems likely Murdoch will hardly be touched by the ongoing investigation (he can spare at least one of the skeletons that not doubt litter his septic tank), it will be interesting to see how this may affect his plans to increase his media monopoly into the UK. Though he probably doesn't need much help on that front. In fact, News Corp is set to buy television company Shine Productions (the company behind the likes of Masterchef and The Tudors) the majority share of which belongs to... Rupert's daughter Elisabeth (I guess the old maxim about keeping it in the family really does ring true occasionally). She stands to make at least £400m from the deal, and speculation is also rife over whether she will become more involved in the running of News Corp. And if so, whether she, or her brother, James, will succeed their father.

Let's at least hope that they don't become as bad as the Borgia, I'm not sure if Rupert's obsidian heart would be able handle the excitement...


http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2011/feb/10/phone-hacking-john-prescott-named
http://www.ft.com/cms/s/0/cd4f972a-344c-11e0-993f-00144feabdc0.html#axzz1DgS4AscP

High Profile Tweetment

Picture source:http://androinica.com

Rumours abound on the internet as the Wall Street Journal has reported that internet giants Facebook and Google, have both held "low-level talks" with Twitter, over the possibility of acquiring the social networking/microblogging service. Twitter's valuation has grown enormously over the past few years and reportedly the current 'RRP' is somewhere between $8bn and $10bn! It's not particularly surprising then, that two of the largest Internet superpowers are eyeing it up like a randy panda looking at a nice, long, hard,  bamboo plant. Especially when you consider what has happened to social networking sites like Bebo and MySpace, it's understandable that Facebook want to have another bird in it's hand for when the next 'big thing' appears. And Google? Well Google's just keeping to it's mission statement: World Domination.

I never got into Twitter myself, though I have several friends who tweet religiously, anything I have to say is much too deep and philosophically ambiguous to be expressed in 140 characters or less. But bloody hell, I wish I'd known about it 5 years ago so I could have bought a couple of shares and capitalised on one of the most simple and popular forms of media on the web. Whether it will stay as such we will only find out with time.

Here is a link to the original article on the WSJ.
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748703716904576134543029279426.html

Rousseau, Romanticism, and the French Revolution.

Bright-eyed and bushy tailed, we emerge from our festering Christmas pits ready to glory in the renewed magnificence of HCJ. After a brief fistfight with a script writing lecturer, we put down our flag and were ready to get cracking. This year we kicked off with a sortie into the Romantic. And no, I'm not talking about Stephanie Meyer's sparkly, angsty, vampire novels (Team Edward FTW).

Perhaps a little background is needed.

We're in France, it is the end the 18th century, the Church's creative force has diminished, and a man named Jean Jacques Rousseau has taken a sabbatical to wander the mountains of Switzerland and the beaches of Vienna. Following an intense experience listening to the sounds of nature, and finding all his cares slipping away, he decides that the void of creative force left by the Church should be filled by the divinity of nature. He felt that all that had been written and proposed before were lies, that there was honesty in nature. That the empiricists were wrong, and it is feeling, not reason, that drives us. Reason did nought but stand in the way of innocence and beauty, and what it was to be truly human.

Rousseau calls to mind a state of nature, quite different to that of Hobbes, who would have us believe that before society was formed, we were all psychotic savages living in an anarchical world and that we cannot be trusted to live without a sword of Damocles threatening to drop at the slightest provocation. Rousseau claims that natural man was virtuous and was the perfect example of humanity. Indeed, he glorified what he called the 'Noble Savage' as being pure and beautiful.

While I'm sure he salivated over the idea of stripping down to a loincloth and running around the countryside, he was intelligent enough to realise that this would not be possible, what with all the trappings of society cemented about us. He claims that the origin of civil society and all of it's incumbent inequalities was found in property.

"The first man [he wrote] who, having enclosed a piece of land, bethought himself of saying "this is mine", and found people simple enough to believe him, was the real founder of society." One wonders what he would have said to Locke on the subject if they had ever met, Locke being a great lover of property and basing near all his philosophy on the stuff. But I digress.

Rousseau's Romanticism was built upon the supremacy of emotions and was essentially a reaction to the enlightenment, which he perceived to be passionless. He despised the situation that man had gotten himself into, saying: "Man is born free but everywhere is in chains. One man thinks himself the master of others, but remains more of a slave than they are." As far as his view is concerned, the world was is rotten, and civilisation corrupt. Man is engulfed in an endless competition of self esteem, which can never truly be conquered, 'am I doing as well as I could be?', 'why is my horse a poorer model than my neighbours?', 'why is the other man's joopleberry shrub always a more mauvy shade of pinky-russet?' etc.

Rousseau wished for a different type of social contract than had been proposed before. The problem was finding a government that would protect you, yet leave you free to do what you wished. And also create laws which everyone agrees with, allowing everyone to keep their freedom.

Now, Rousseau's idea of 'everyone' needs a little explanation. He came up with the concept of 'general will'  which decides the best way doing anything e.g. "we shall all eat Crunchy Nut for breakfast." Every citizen has a share in the general will, allowing everyone to be free, yet it is a conglomerate, and if an individual was to differ from the mass, then they would be "forced to be free." think of it as a tyrannical form of peer pressure, à la 1984.

This 'cult of sensibility', while initially, not particularly popular,was a political time bomb that would throw all of France into chaos. All it would take was a country that was completely out of pocket, and a king willing to let the paysans help sort it out. Quel surprise! Just such an event occurred. The commoners were brought in to discuss the country's financial problems and they decided this would be a perfect time to write their own constitution, which happened to be in the image of Mr Rousseau. Men being free and equal, and laws being an expression of "general will". This eventually led to the French Revolution.

As revolutions go, this one began somewhat, bureaucratically. Until the Bastille was stormed, a symbolic act that apparently irritated the six or seven prisoners residing there, as they had probably been having a kip. Whilst all this unruliness was going on in France, radicals in England, were becoming more and more intrigued. Indeed, many went over to France to see Rousseau's natural man becoming a reality for themselves. Wordsworth wrote that "Bliss was it in that dawn to be alive, but to be young was very heaven."

But of course, this could not last. The power vacuum that resulted from the idea of general will, meant that no one had any idea who was supposed to be in charge, leaving everyone running around like the proverbial chicken. France's neighbouring countries, were not looking too happily at the chaos beginning to engulf France. The Prussians (being renowned for their sense of liberty and their happy-go-lucky attitude) were looking to invade France and banish this unseemly attitude once and for all. And the French, becoming more and more paranoid, began handing out weapons willy-nilly to allow the citizens to defend themselves and their country (the two being virtually synonymous). And this, coupled with their paranoia, made the French begin to massacre each other in search of counter revolutionaries. Tens of thousands died before it was brought to an end, along with much of the revolution, though it changed France forever. A legacy of the Romantics. Take that Robert Pattinson!

During the lecture, we also discussed Mary Wollstonecraft, and her writing, including her Vindications of the Rights of Women. But as she will be the subject of our seminar next week, I will discuss her in more detail then. Cheerio!